I've been learning the concept of ego & responsibility vs. total surrender to 'God' (and by God I mean the sum total of all things). It is said that you either claim responsibility for all that you accomplish in life, or you give credit to God. The second option works in your favor when things go poorly–'it was God's will; the universe has other plans for me.'

It makes me think of the artists that win awards and always dedicate them to God. I usually roll my eyes because most of these guys have such big egos that you know it is insincere.

However, it's an interesting concept of laying all your actions at God's feet: Do your best and let God do the rest.

I'm wondering if the same applies to randomness vs. God's Plan. Either everything is random or it is all part of God's Plan. My experience has made me feel that you do reap what you sow, and that you do get what you need in life (just not always what you want). So even though I love the concept of chaos and randomness, it seems like things are pretty well ordered sometimes. But that may just be the engineer in me trying to solve puzzles.

Enough thoughts for tonight…

I can’t believe I forgot to blog about this, but I found out about a month ago that the couple that bought some eggs from me a while back found out they are pregnant! It took them 2 cycles to be successful. MY Mom and Dad were quite excited that they were going to be some kind of grandparents again!

It’s pretty wild to think that my DNA is growing in another woman’s stomach as we speak, and all the traits the biological mother (ME!) passes on are being passed on. Please send your thoughts and prayers this way for a safe pregnancy and healthy child…the parents are actually going to send me a picture of the baby once he/she is born. Wild times we live in.

I would do it again, but there is always a risk when you are injecting yourself with higher levels of hormones, not to mention infection risks of getting your ovaries pierced to extract the eggs. I wouldn’t want to screw up my OWN chances of delivering a child. On the other hand, who knows, these kids could likely be in better hands and homes than mine :) I don’t have any delusions that I would be a perfect parent, by any means. At least I know this one will be in good hands.