Pacified (33/1000)

The pacifier is back in my ears
Played a game of disinterest
For too many years
It wasn't my game, but I got comfortable with it
Now to sit with a stranger
My mind races for words
Not sure of what suits the moment
The energy
I'm playing a new game
Where I'm guessing the rules
But music I can dance with

Black Eyed Peas

This quote fits me perfectly tonight. On the front porch at my after-dance block party of one.

"Welcome to the end
Do not panic
There is nothing to fear
Everything around you is changing
Nothing stays the same
This version of myself is not permanent
Tomorrow I will be different
The energy never dies
Energy cannot be destroyed or created
It always Is
And it always will Be
This is the End and the Beginning
Forever
Infinite
Welcome"

AVN Awards

“I consider it an honor, a privilege, and a challenge to lick a woman’s box.”
– Best Lesbian Scene Award-Winner
Hahahahahahaha

and, from the same woman:

“I f****d a lot of people this year. I want to say thank you to everyone who let me f**k them. Each person tastes different.”

Soldiers of Peace (31/1000)

Misery was my steady companion
It missed me
So it jumped on my back
Seducing me
With its heavy blanket
Started whispering in my ear
Warping my thoughts
And twisting his words
I was finally happy
But it would have nothing of it
Sad felt grounding…
Comfortable…
Normal…
So I sank with it
Down just one step
Then two, then three
And soon found myself
Covered in despair
Thinking thoughts that felt foreign,
Petty, senseless, and desperate
So thank God for a friend
Who went there with me
And listened to my bewildered musings
Until the truth came to light
Of the load I was under
That I had put on myself
To wrongly feel good
So I threw off my misery
For the second time this year
And felt happy and free
And hopeful again
Now I see
More clearly
That normal is different
I must be vigilant
And guard my new happiness
With every soldier of peace that I’ve got