Missing You

Oh, what tangled webs we weave in the night
I’m trying to make sense of it all
When love comes at you in so many forms
What is God trying to say through these mouths?

Hearts in all stages of opening
Confused by the stories we tell
Would that my heart could more purely be moved
By the needs that my love came to fill

When it comes to love
Please take away words
Ly down
What’s more real than singing?

They told us a lie
What is easy is hard
And that shields us from living more bold.

I hate what I’ve done
I hate what you’ve done
Didn’t we come here to build?

I must practice love
Every second in time
I can’t live without God any longer

Loving

Today we celebrated
Loving, loving, loving
Don’t often practice
Loving, loving, loving
I pet my cat
Loving, loving, loving
Like a river moving through me
Loving, loving, loving
It opens up to you
Loving, loving, loving
Carving wider through my being
Loving, loving, loving
That we could always be
Loving, loving, loving
I feel my insides heal
Loving, loving, loving

Big, Bad Woofs

Just the right subject to take me out of my city mentality, my parents showed me this picture when I first arrived in Montana. The story goes that this woman they know was out bow-hunting in Idaho and this 150-lb wolf jumped out of the bushes about 10 feet in front of her. The woman felt as if she was being tracked as its prey, and had a gun with her so she pulled it out and shot the wolf and escaped, guessing others were closeby in a pack. She later went back to have a picture with it.

There has been great tension between men and wolf in the northern states, especially since Canadian wolves were experimentally reintroduced to Yellowstone National Park and Idaho in the mid-nineties to thin out the elk population, a project first proposed in 1966. “The Idaho state government opposed the reintroduction of wolves into the state and many citizens feel as if the wolves were forced onto the state by the federal government” (Wikipedia article). Wolves are at the top of the food chain and are considered a threat to farmers, ranchers, and hunters. There are now just under 100 documented wolves in the park, though some sites estimate nearly 1000 wolves between Montana and Idaho.

This was an interesting bumpersticker I saw at the gas station my second day in Montana: Save 100 elk, Kill a wolf. Ah, home sweet home!

Can’t Stand Me

Numbed by the weight of my inaction
I feel so uncourageous
There’s an expression in me
Which begs to be revealed
In 24/7 full glory
Life is too short
To keep the lid on
Dare to be different
Gain a friend in yourself

Burned Out

Hanging from the edge of a cliff I’ve created
A foothold I’ll find but it’s nowhere in sight
Tired of being pushed by the forces that move me
Probably just tired
And drained by the sun

Common Denominator

Maybe the ending badly is a symptom of starting badly
Life is short and I’m so quick to love
Someday a big heart’s going to value a heart
That opens so wide in front of them

Some loves are like taxis
They take you there
Then drop you off once you’ve paid the fare
And you wonder what the driver’s going to do
In the lifetime they’ll spend apart from you

And in swimming through a sea of bodies
Rare are shells that turn your head
On a midsummer night
Under the moon
When all you want is a heart to walk with yours

They’ve scattered like mice
And new moths to the light
Are drawn by the fire
I’ve stoked from within

God bless the women
Who purge the world’s pain
Through their bodies and tears
Holding men’s hearts until the beating stops

Only Time

I have a sneaking suspicion I’ve had it wrong all along
That’s why swimming in chaos and wine feels so sweet
The delicious feeling of living at last
Where the plan and the moment merge into one
The present and the past diverging so fast
My lovers don’t know whether to bite or bring toys
Pouring over every card in the deck
The Aces show up when they will
Creating more memories of the real me
Takes time
And now time’s all I have