Receive

The silver fireworks finale inside me
Illuminating the need for receiving
And the fact that you get
Everything you ask for
And you must open up
Every square inch to
Receive, receive, receive
Until your cup runneth over

Eyesight Improvement Test, Round 2?

So, I realized after re-reading the eyesight improvement guide I had been “following” for 30 days, that I had made a huge omission in the procedure.

I forgot most of the relaxation practice of the eyes, including taking 3 days off for every 4 days on.

It’s fitting that I should make this error. As I went along the experiment, I began feeling some strain as I looked into the distance without glasses/contacts. My instinct was to relax the vision rather than strain further, which seemed to produce a slightly more clear image. However, I became focused on the fact that straining meant I was somehow “exercising” the eyes and that would make them better, so I really focused more on the exercising than the relaxing drills.

Re-reading the document, more focus seems to be placed on RELAXING the eyes rather than EXERCISING the eyes, the premise being that the eyes under strain is what caused the poor vision to begin with.

This actually makes sense to me, and OF COURSE I wouldn’t focus on the relaxation piece. This reminds me of when I began taking yoga classes mid-way through college. I went into the classes with the mindset of “I”m gonna stretch farther, harder, and better than everyone in here, and withstand more pain.” What I learned over the next eight years was the importance of balancing effort with relaxation in order to produce long-lasting results and a healthy body.

Thanks to my friend Ajit for passing on this link to Sri Aurobindo’s eyesight improvement program: http://www.collaboration.org/centers/bureaucentral/Departments/eye_clinic.htm

I am going to develop a kind of hybrid of these two and give it another go :-) I’m especially looking forward to eyes closed solarization move!

RESULTS: No more glasses?

The eyes have been tested and…

NO IMPROVEMENT

Science sucks, haha. :-p

Contacts are back in today. I can see clearly now…

My 30-day experiment has unfortunately countered the claims put forth in this document: http://www.scribd.com/doc/4958881/Eye-Exercises-to-Natural-Vision-Correction-FREE

Not only did I not get a 1 point vision improvement per week, I got NO points improvement in 4 weeks.

So what did I learn?

  • Improving eye muscle function by doing 10-15 minutes of eye exercises per day does not seem to have any impact on the vision over 30 days
  • Not wearing corrective lenses does not contribute to eyes developing stronger vision on their own over 30 days
  • Sharper vision gives more details of objects, therefore more to scrutinize for an over-analytical person. I found that my self-scrutiny decreased and my confidence in public generally increased when not correcting my vision. There may be some times in the future when I will purposefully not wear my contacts/glasses for this reason.
  • I am even skeptical that focusing exercises will work now, given my zero improvement overall, when many of the 30 days were done with focus exercises that caused eye watering & tension headaches.

Time to start saving for laser eye surgery :-)

Days 28/29/30: No more glasses

Day 28: Did my exercises.
Day 29: No exercises.
Day 30: Flopped into bed after an exhausting 16 hours of work, mostly having to have worn my old full-prescription glasses (which did give me headaches!).

Today is the big day, my eye test is at 9:30am. I will find out if these darned eye exercises actually improved my vision or not! Did my eye routine one last time this morning, for good measure.

Play with Fire

You can be a better person by not lying to yourself. There’s a reason that you’re cheating and good and bad do not exist. When you’re a child, lines are easy; necessary, enforceable. Find your power, test your knowledge, draw the boundaries of yourself. We hold to rules when we feel pain. Become rigid and untrusting. There is safety in the numbers of the minds that never grow. It can be hard to admit that what you like might make them angry. Run from anger, run from tears, run from all that hurt your child. But when it hurts too much to live in routines that feel like death, you’ll choose fire over emptiness and from ashes you will rise.

Not Yet Committed

Red, black
Back up
What was that idea?
Flip it over, turn it sideways
Strip it naked
Turn on the bright lights
Is that still a good idea?
Watching it
Stick its head out
Breaking through the life/death shell
Will it make it in this world?
Will it fill a human need?

Day 26/27: No more glasses

Day 26: Pretty sure I didn’t even do my eye exercises. I meant to, while lying in bed close to midnight, but went to sleep instead. Day 26 was a Monday, a start of a new daily routine for the fall which involved more work and it threw me off my priorities.

Day 27: With all the detailed computer work, reading, and cell-phone facebook/twitter/blogging/note-taking I like to do, my eyes feel doomed. Obviously I haven’t instituted my focus breaks yet. New plan: tomorrow, set phone timer to go off every thirty minutes while on my laptop to stop and do far focus exercises.

This could be my last hope!

Sideways Whispers

Too jacked up tonight

I’ve been feeding my dreams
And listening for my demons
The sideways whispers
That sound familiar,
Like a mother’s comforting
There, there
Don’t you go wrapping your heart around things that might make you cry if you don’t get them

I hear that garbage when you speak
And I want to steal it from the air
Before it reaches anyone else’s ears
Years wasted in: I can’t
Years wasted in: I’m small
Years wasted in: What would *they* think?
After all, dreams that come true are just guilty lucky accidents, right?

Who dares to grow when no one is applauding the millimeters?

Who dares to travel somewhere alone, no map, expecting wrong turns?

Might as well just hang out with all your friends in Miserytown.
Keep reading that yearbook: Don’t ever change!

Lonely Boring City People

Seething over my inability
To create something raw, unique
My poems ride on little pillows
Down the aisle
One by one

It’s about time
Some gunshots went off
And scared everyone out of their shells
It’s so much more fun
When you all come out to play