I’m falling into you
I feel you catching me
A hundred hands
Saying yes
We trust you

I’m in an active phase

In a world where you can go
By disease
An act of nature
A lead bullet
Bad timing
I’m going to take my chances

Build my own plane and fly it
See who wants to come with me
I’m going out a warrior
Someone who came into this world to wrestle demons
Slay dragons
Bottle rainbows
Climb the peaks for the better views

I’m in an active phase

I want every action I take
To have life
To have purpose
To have quality
To be epic
To say “ME”

Because at the end of it all
It’s not about how spiritual you get
Or about how wealthy you get

It’s about who you become
And how much you like you
And what colors you’ve painted your world

Your satisfaction
Your having taken action
Is all that will survive your grave

You had me in your arms but we both had other plans
I melted at your sadness
And I knew I had your heart

It was only for a week
But a week changed everything
I would never come within
A canyon’s reach of you again

Even when we laid together
Naked and entwined
Who grew the distance?
I felt you leave

I tried to trap you
Tried to please you
Tried to ignore my breaking heart
Tried to take care of myself

I let you go
A hundred times
And I cried
A hundred times
And the farther away I go
The closer I seem to get to you

You’ve called me back from the edge of death
My pulse quickens at your name
I’m trying
All the time
But I just can’t seem to leave you.

Stop it!
You’re not really fighting
Too scared to throw a real punch
You plant landmines for each other
And dance around your pain
It’s pathetic
Fearful of getting hurt
You wave your sword in the air like a coward
Be a real warrior
And aim straight for the heart

Here Again
Last time: don’t write, just observe
This time: remember stuff
Remember it’s all the same
Don’t Keep Coming Back Here
The same escape
No matter what the name
The little pets become
The continuity you crave, the landmarks
It’s cold here
And one world keeps
Beckoning me into the other
A different seduction each time
And just make sure the
Money and the illusion
The heat and the cold
But why does one seduction
Tempt me so much?
That it tells me an elaborate story
Each time to bring me back as if
It were the true actor in
My life’s story.
Will it ever hate me enough to kill me?
Repeating patterns until learned

I can see the temptation
To write a spiritual story
About how we went through many lives
To finally end up
Here!
So are we building another tower of Babel?

Will our technology connect our minds
And in doing so,
Drop the walls between our perspectives
Our incarnations
And reveal the Wizard behind the curtain?

Is that why we love science so much?
Giving us glimpses into the “other”
Seeing life from their perspective
Knowing the infinite integral of us is God

That sense of unity one feels
During trips or meditation
All the endings looped to beginnings
No sense of up or down
Back or forward
Wrong or right

Just a salty wave-crash sommersault
Until we popped up and took a breath

All I know is I keep opening my eyes
And there’s a comforting continuity
That surely exists outside my psyche
How could I create what I haven’t imagined?
And yet when I see it it’s all so perfect
It’s all how I would have planned it
I can keep choosing to follow my story
It’s pretty clear where this one’s going
Though the twists and turns are delightful
And the details rich and vivid

Caught in the middle
Everything’s changing
I’m the fulcrum now
Watching the hurricane spin around me
The carnage and drama
And my core strength
Keeping me stable
While we spin balanced with this heavy object
Life
My new hammer throw
Gathering data
Gathering momentum
For a torrential display of power
Grace, and beauty
One final,
Perfected triumph
On the world’s stage
Flinging far, far away
What is cruel, hidden, and festering
Exposing within us all
What is worthy of glory, honor, and praise
Weathering the storm
And emerging with renewed strength
Again and again
And again and again

Hidden beneath their harsh words
Judgements
Attacks
Attempts to change you
Disdain
Lies a heart so close to yours
You wouldn’t feel a difference
If it were in your body
Your fiercest enemies
See a mirror in you
And deep down
They want to crawl inside you
Steal what they couldn’t take for themselves
And leave your carcass to rot
They are not really killers
They are a parallel version
Of you
And you
Of them

What a wild, wild projection!
Decide to be spiritual
And have everything taken away
Decide to be profitable
And have even more added to you
Decide to be useful
A call out of the blue
The hard part is knowing what you want
Or is it?
Maybe the hard part is trusting what you want
And the only way to be more trusting
Is to leap
Before the net appears
Fuck on the first date
Hitch a ride somewhere
Eat that last piece of nobody’s chocolate
Knock and the door will be opened unto you…

The spiritual thinkers have it wrong
We must dare to love
But also dare to hate
Not denying the duality
That brings about
The play of the universe

If we are moving toward love
We are propelled by hate
Though love as a word
Is pretty inadequate

Selflessness
The love behind our actions
But hate
Gives passion to movement

An inability to remain in a state any longer
That is not conducive to growth or giving
A disgust
A revolt
A wish to kill
What is breathing down our necks
And threatens what we love
Yes, love is what makes us valuable
But hate is what makes us useful

For many years I had nothing negative to say
Teachers criticized my lack of critique
But I am learned enough now
To have an opinion
To know what I love
And to know what I hate