Feeling so present
So safe in the moment
Hard to imagine
Life changing all that much
Easy to dismiss
Thousands of years
Generation after generation
Mutation upon mutation
That has lead to this moment
And all life is feeding me
My cells have been carefully prepared
Over thousands of years
I preserve ancient history
In my limbic brain and nerves
I connect with mother earth
Through oxygen and carbon exchange
And who am I now noticing
The depth of this moment
The consequences of our actions
I am a sense in a larger organism
I see things, know things, hear things
And my job is to keep us safe
As is yours and all of ours
And see how far we can reach
Our lineage forward across the map of time
Discovering as we go
Who we are and what is God

Getting drawn-in to a drunk stranger
The body’s chemicals igniting
The myriad of processes churning
My electrical, my bacteria, my structural, my forever
Chattering observer
An annoying tour guide
But someone I’m quite attached to
We have fun together
But sometimes
It all starts to unravel again
And I fear being pulled into
The all-connected bliss
Where I cease to exist again
Because in that network
Nothing matters
Whether you live or die
It makes no difference
Because it was all just a merry dream
Row, row, rowing your boat
And with a foot in both worlds
Each vying for your full attention
You’ve got to avoid the stuff that tips your boat over
Because being a drop in the ocean is helpful
Only so much as it enables you to live
Your most awesome earth experience
So that
As the tension builds
Upon the billions of years that brought the sun’s light to our synapses
We are realizing
We are caught up in each other’s dreams
In this age of information
What can light do?
Where can light go?
And why should light care?
Because I’m only a third of the way there and I’m already
Tiring of the trivia, tiring of being half-animal
And half-enlightened
But at the same time enjoying the show.
Playing my character to the best of her ability
And constantly looking over my shoulder at what our expectations are creating.
The trick seems to be becoming easeful
Peaceful
Useful
That seems to work,
And accepting that being human means
You’re tempted by oblivion
But exalted by engagement

Jumping out of the currents of a career
You are free
And yet the air feels different
Through your gills
You know how to breathe in water
It’s a little more lonely
At first
But they all seem to notice
And applaud the courage of your leap
Not yet willing to unlock
The golden handcuffs
But then another one breaks loose
And you start to realize
It’s not for everyone
That we cling as long as we need
To the illusion of safety
Because the mud feels really solid
Routine puts a weight on our shoulders
That guarantees
Tomorrow will look the same.

Opening up new doors to walk through
Rooms tall and spacious
Full of delight
Where anything can and does happen
Swimming in good vibes, illusions
Wading through needs, possibilities
Standing in one spot
In a room full of people
Where the air flows cool and you feel so comfortable
That everyone wants to be around you

Unfolding
Into the new chairs
Feeling so much more comfortable
In my skin
Had to leave and come back
Accepting my silly drives
And my youth

So much more patient now
Respectful of the ties that bind
Aware of my surroundings
And the genius currents of fate
I swim with more grace and awe
A wink to the universe

So many
Dreaming
We meet
Expecting to be delighted
The magic of the experience
Is to live the experience
With eyes wide open
Life dreamed us
So that we could see this

We crave life as it is
The one we recognize
So familiar
We are afraid to break the matrix
What if the sexiest man in the city
Kept wanting you?
What if your bus became a convertible?
What if everyone around you
Turned wildly successful?
What if your most private dreams
Came true
Right in front of you?
Would you walk through that door?
Or throw rocks at it,
Tell it to go away,
And stop teasing you?

Close my eyes and this will all be gone
The city has become so small
No more towers mocking me overhead
Or bricks denying entry
I came to San Francisco to disappear in the fog
My vanishing took 5 years
And once I got comfortable being naked
I gained the courage to move on

Perception
Such a delicate thing
Persistent
Yet another pretty little bow
Tied neatly on top this box of junk
The end of an era
A time for reflection
A moment to pause,
Dream again,
And start over

Another night in San Francisco
You can do whatever you want here
And I’m bone tired about to fall asleep
Anything you dream can happen
Why dream the same dream twice?
Maybe this time you’ll be lucid enough
To break the matrix