Happy Girl

I’m grinning ear to ear
Sex: the final vast frontier
Getting in the habit
Of doing what I want
Getting clear on what I need
Sitting deeply in my fears
Talking out what makes me timid
Reeling from the years of always
Denying what I feel
In favor of what would be right
Letting others make my choices
So I didn’t have to think
Now I stand on my two feet
Feeling happy, free, and proud

God after Science

We need a new prophet to show us God after science
So many people now just can’t relate
To a ruler, a Lord, a man, a king
Something peering down from the heavens

We need a new concept
Because God is just Love
And Love is biological
It sustains our life on Earth

And the people need to see
How forgiveness is efficient
And kindness calms the masses
And how the meek and small win hearts

And why the way to Love is a path that is difficult to tread
And that the rewards are worth the discipline
‘Cause Inner peace brings health and life

And you’re punished not in brimstone
But in your minds and in your guts
And in the ways the world will treat you
When you choose to harm yourself

There are way too many empty seats
In churches ’round the country
We need language we relate to
So that all can sing to God

Step Toward Your Dreams

If yesterday had a theme, it would be that passivity and lack of goals/focus gets you nowhere. Met a young woman working as an airport cafe cashier who said she tried college but hated it. I probed a bit and the root was that she didn’t really have something to aim for, just taking general classes. Of course she hated it! She was so beautiful and sweet and clearly just needed a reason to succeed at something.

I also had a great chat with my cousin about the same theme. It’s something I think is really missing in our society: guidance for the middle 80 percent of students who have no idea what to apply their passion and energy toward.

I had a long history of achievement and confidence when I graduated high school, so in college I was motivated by pride and also poverty (wanting to create a better life than I was handed). I pursued a degree with the most immediate and highest payout (short of gambling!).

This passivity that many students bring to college infects everything else: political involvement, relationships, everything.

The easiest way to start overcoming this is to start getting on top of your small everyday accomplishments. Make a list of everything you’ve been putting off and do one of them. The feeling of accomplishment is powerful and leads to more positive actions in the direction of your dreams.

Receive

The silver fireworks finale inside me
Illuminating the need for receiving
And the fact that you get
Everything you ask for
And you must open up
Every square inch to
Receive, receive, receive
Until your cup runneth over

Eyesight Improvement Test, Round 2?

So, I realized after re-reading the eyesight improvement guide I had been “following” for 30 days, that I had made a huge omission in the procedure.

I forgot most of the relaxation practice of the eyes, including taking 3 days off for every 4 days on.

It’s fitting that I should make this error. As I went along the experiment, I began feeling some strain as I looked into the distance without glasses/contacts. My instinct was to relax the vision rather than strain further, which seemed to produce a slightly more clear image. However, I became focused on the fact that straining meant I was somehow “exercising” the eyes and that would make them better, so I really focused more on the exercising than the relaxing drills.

Re-reading the document, more focus seems to be placed on RELAXING the eyes rather than EXERCISING the eyes, the premise being that the eyes under strain is what caused the poor vision to begin with.

This actually makes sense to me, and OF COURSE I wouldn’t focus on the relaxation piece. This reminds me of when I began taking yoga classes mid-way through college. I went into the classes with the mindset of “I”m gonna stretch farther, harder, and better than everyone in here, and withstand more pain.” What I learned over the next eight years was the importance of balancing effort with relaxation in order to produce long-lasting results and a healthy body.

Thanks to my friend Ajit for passing on this link to Sri Aurobindo’s eyesight improvement program: http://www.collaboration.org/centers/bureaucentral/Departments/eye_clinic.htm

I am going to develop a kind of hybrid of these two and give it another go :-) I’m especially looking forward to eyes closed solarization move!

RESULTS: No more glasses?

The eyes have been tested and…

NO IMPROVEMENT

Science sucks, haha. :-p

Contacts are back in today. I can see clearly now…

My 30-day experiment has unfortunately countered the claims put forth in this document: http://www.scribd.com/doc/4958881/Eye-Exercises-to-Natural-Vision-Correction-FREE

Not only did I not get a 1 point vision improvement per week, I got NO points improvement in 4 weeks.

So what did I learn?

  • Improving eye muscle function by doing 10-15 minutes of eye exercises per day does not seem to have any impact on the vision over 30 days
  • Not wearing corrective lenses does not contribute to eyes developing stronger vision on their own over 30 days
  • Sharper vision gives more details of objects, therefore more to scrutinize for an over-analytical person. I found that my self-scrutiny decreased and my confidence in public generally increased when not correcting my vision. There may be some times in the future when I will purposefully not wear my contacts/glasses for this reason.
  • I am even skeptical that focusing exercises will work now, given my zero improvement overall, when many of the 30 days were done with focus exercises that caused eye watering & tension headaches.

Time to start saving for laser eye surgery :-)

Days 28/29/30: No more glasses

Day 28: Did my exercises.
Day 29: No exercises.
Day 30: Flopped into bed after an exhausting 16 hours of work, mostly having to have worn my old full-prescription glasses (which did give me headaches!).

Today is the big day, my eye test is at 9:30am. I will find out if these darned eye exercises actually improved my vision or not! Did my eye routine one last time this morning, for good measure.

Play with Fire

You can be a better person by not lying to yourself. There’s a reason that you’re cheating and good and bad do not exist. When you’re a child, lines are easy; necessary, enforceable. Find your power, test your knowledge, draw the boundaries of yourself. We hold to rules when we feel pain. Become rigid and untrusting. There is safety in the numbers of the minds that never grow. It can be hard to admit that what you like might make them angry. Run from anger, run from tears, run from all that hurt your child. But when it hurts too much to live in routines that feel like death, you’ll choose fire over emptiness and from ashes you will rise.

Not Yet Committed

Red, black
Back up
What was that idea?
Flip it over, turn it sideways
Strip it naked
Turn on the bright lights
Is that still a good idea?
Watching it
Stick its head out
Breaking through the life/death shell
Will it make it in this world?
Will it fill a human need?