16,000 days to go
Let’s fill each one with magic and love and dreams manifested
Don’t Get Too Comfortable
Lulled into promises of safety
Anesthetized by your labor
Working paycheck to paycheck
With no end in sight
Sitting at the bottom of a corporate pyramid
Feeling the weight of the wallets above you
Glancing up through that glass ceiling
You’re agreeing to a culture that’s half-alive
And family relations that are half-destroyed
Cause the work’s not that important
If you can’t share your love
And what will you do when the layoffs come?
Where there’s a will, there’s a way
To live the life of your dreams
Don’t just passively agree with whoever dreamed this scheme
Digging Deeper in Love
I ate the fruit
From the forbidden tree
It’s all a running to or running away from love
You showed me how fun
My life could be
Then I ran toward and you ran away from love
He showed me how intimate life could be
Then I ran away and he ran away from love
Are we vessels for love?
Then how pure are we?
As the plants follow sun we are drawn to love
It takes work to be present to another’s needs
To give and receive is a lesson in love
To really be honest and say what you mean
Is a way of respecting and honoring love
But a discipline too
Why not cursing is practice in finding right words
And our heart thumps in love
When truth eloquently speaks
Give your love through your breath
Say just how you feel
People can bear more pain
Than we allow them to know
And through pain comes a depth
Richness of understanding
That sugar-coated half-truths
And allusions can’t touch
I’m ready to reach deeply into my soul
Start with ones closest you
Lay it bare and feel whole
International Travel
Had a really cool discussion with my 18-yo housemate about travel, and how, when in another country, it is wise to do as the Romans do when in Rome.
She offered an insightful analogy about how you are a different person even when you hang out at a friend’s house, particularly if they live with their family. There are different customs, attitudes, and house rules to live by.
Ravyn left this morning for her first international voyage: three weeks in Ireland. Bon voyage!
Everything At Once
Lusting for cracks in the concrete
I wanna watch everything
Just fucking collapse
Into piles of rubble
The shots in the air tonight
A wakeup call
What are you doing with your life?
Live on the precipice
The knife’s edge of comfort
Do something every day
That scares the shit out of you
We’re full of it anyway
Yeah, you’re full of shit
When you don’t live up to the glory
Your ancestors left you with
What else is there to do in life
But risk, shine, build
Start a god-damned fire
And bask in its heat
Suck the blood out of the neck of life
And enjoy its intoxicating effects
Feel your system light in bliss
Close your eyes and start dancing
Let your heart break and bleed
Until you attract a nurse with a soft blanket
Stop saying
“I like you”
And wrap your thousand arms around this life
Once Black and White
Your beats weave through me
As the wind licks my skin
I close my eyes
And the memories start dancing
Like the way he looked at me
And the times I’ve been loved
And how it’s always changing
Like a good house track
So I savor this moment
With his hand in my hand
Because at 4:16
He’s ending the song
Then I’ll swim in the terror
Of the void of his love
But this time we’ll talk
And he’ll pull at my chain
And remind me the story
I’ve told to myself
About how good it feels
To do just as they said
And I’ll remember the purity
Of the days of my youth
When there was just one man
In my future for sure
Before I learned how to give
Of myself to another
Before I learned to take care of myself in the mix
Before my family tree sprouted six rogue branches
And the colors took over
What was once black and white
Give Me More!
I’m having some feelings tonight that my only regrets in life will be that I did not laugh with enough people, ask enough questions, care enough, massage enough tight muscles, make love enough, or savor enough wonderful foods, drinks, herbs, and landscapes.
The more I receive the more I crave. Life is good.
Move!!!!
Most of the action
Takes place in our brains
We forget we are animals
Flesh, blood, muscles, oxygen
The bodies suffer
Fat, weak, slow, dying
Unless you’re ready
To be a disembodied head
I suggest living more
Like the raw beast nature intended
Heart Quality
How does your heart feel?
Heavy with fog?
Locked down in chains?
Did you forget the feeling of flying free?
The magic is in your wizardry
Wave a wand in your mind
And you can create
A softness, the temperature
That would make your heart happy
Dismiss anyone
Who messes with the switch
Constantly
Erase the thoughts
That produce the chemicals
That invade the heart
Demean the spirit
Make you feel anything other than
Safe, powerful, bright, and loving
Planting Organic Seeds
Perhaps symbolically, all the leaves have fallen off my money tree so I’m pruning it and growing it again from nothing!
I really enjoyed a coaching session tonight with an entrepreneur in the organic farming field. Sharing about what I’ve been through helps me reaffirm the life choices I’m making now around money and my life’s work.
My business card has officially gotten out of control. I think I should just come up with a general title (name?) and link to one website or something that in turn lists everything else I do. The font is getting too small to list the emails and websites for everything from hike tours to small business coaching, pre-paid legal, sfsu coach, massage therapy, and soon-to-be certified astrologer. Goodness. Oops, I forgot yoga teacher. I get to observe my first in-jail yoga class for violent offenders next week before I begin teaching again.
My ambition to become more connected with family, community, and world is slowly but surely actualizing. I am enjoying feelings of expansion, resourcefulness, and service to others, as well as the pleasure of receiving the universe’s gifts. I am being moved by pleasure first, common sense second. Really open to what might be needed around me, and learning a lot.
Tired now, more to come…