I don’t understand why people do drugs. I’m pressing on my sore eyeballs right now and I see thousands of beautiful fractal patterns in moving fluorescent colors exploding from one point, like they’re little light boxes flying away. The other eye gives me a different show, like a black and white checkerboard print with morphing dark globs expanding and contracting. While making love or listening to music, I can close my eyes and see beautiful landscapes and amazing color combinations, light shows, movement like I’m flying or driving really fast, or feel emotions swirl and move all over my body. My dreams and pre-dream states always entertain and trip me out. I don’t know. I guess I just don’t really need drugs :-)
Each Little Mystery
A personal log of my inner thoughts
“I don’t have to think/i only have to do it/the results are always perdect/but that’s old news”…I think some folks have damaged endogenous opioid systems. Their bodies do not produce enough natural painkillers or happy chemicals, and so they augment themselves with drugs. Very few folks become the street addict with tjhe singular purpose of scoring drugs before all other pursuits. Many other drug users do drugs so they can enjoy life like folks with better brain chemistry…Drugs are expensive and often a hassle to obtain. That fact alone makes me believe that it isn’t a choice for many folks, but rather a need. But that’s just my opinion. I’m sure most drug users wish they could just wake up and feel normal. That’s a lot easier than expending energy and money to obtain drugs. Be very glad that pressing on your eyes is novel enough to make you happy!
Some great points Francis, thanks! And it’s not that pressing on my eyes is novel (I’ve been doing it 30 years), but you’re probably correct that my brain chemistry, pain tolerance, and happiness is at a level that allows me to take pleasure in the simplest of activities. Just looking at my cat’s face or watching clouds move and thinking about our existence on this floating globe makes me feel high and feels like an escape from “reality”. And I am grateful.
Come to think of it, I was in quite a lot of pain when I wrote this post. I had a terrible headache from about 7pm on last night. (Probably a result of overusing atrophied basketball muscles pushing a men’s ball).