In the wake of the Roe vs. Wade anniversary, I am reminded of a topic I find very interesting, not the least because people in my life have such polar, strong opinions about it.

Having been an egg donor six times has given me a unique perspective on the pro-choice/pro-life debate. I’ve come to realize that reproduction ethics just aren’t as simple or black and white as they once were.

In the eyes of some “pro-lifers”, I might deserve a medal, having personally created well over 100 embryos. Most were frozen, a handful became children. Isn’t this fantastic? I really did my reproductive duty!

But it makes me wonder, if every embryo created is truly a special, precious gift from God, then why aren’t more pro-life women creating more embryos? You can do it twice a year or possibly more often. Then instead of just one angel getting its earthly wings, 10 or 20 could!

The point that some don’t want to entertain is that not all eggs should become embryos, and not all embryos should become people. And no one actually wants the seemingly God-like responsibility of deciding that, but technology has brought us to that crossroads. So until we can get a little more sophisticated in our arguments (“Embryos are people!”), we won’t be having a very useful nor interesting discussion.

Some pro-lifers will argue that embryos created in a non-loving relationship should be exempt from forced reproduction, like in cases of rape or incest. And this is being more thoughtful. Families and communities must also draw lines when it comes to disorders and birth defects.

I think most people would not be in favor of ramping up US birth rates by 20-40 times annually, even though with technology it is possible.

Pretty much no one is actually pro-abortion. Abortion sucks, it’s unpleasant, and sad. But it is as necessary as our mistakes are, and the “save the embryos!” argument is basically pointless, unless, of course, the mother agrees.